It's Nothing Serious

Steve Jobs Returns To His

In Tess LaCoil on June 23, 2009 at 1:17 pm
iPhones new occupation as Apples beating heart.

iPhone's new application as Apple's beating heart.

Apple Chief Executive Steve Jobs has returned to work after taking a leave of absence in order to have an operation rumoured to replace or given him a new soul. Uncorrelated screams of horror were reported coming from his personal Spirit Guide just prior to the event itself.

The controversial surgery was reported to have taken place at his 17,000 foot Colonial Mansion in  California, under the patient eyes of Jobs’ faithful canine companion, Wuffles.

“We’re very glad to have him back,” said an Apple employee. “Brushing off his furniture was such a pain when he has a perfectly serviceable body to prevent it from collecting dust in the first place.”

Alongside rumours of the soul transplant Jobs is said to have replaced his heart for the newest G3 iPhone, several nerves for the iconic white earphone cords and had the iPod scrollwheel tattooed into his shoulder. These changes to Jobs’ physique have lead to wild discussion amongst users as to whether they should follow in his stead. One proposed that the iShuffle would make a more efficient circulatory organ.

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